date : 12 March 2013
time : 2321hrs

Assalamualaikum..

Im blogging now coz I dowanna share my thoughts in Twitter.. not a good platform.. ppl can see what Im feeling.. I will just post it here..

6 more months to our wedding but Im not that excited.. maybe not excited at all.. deep down Im scared.. Im scared it might not go the way I want it to be..

My fiancee has not been working since Jan 2013.. I need help with the finance.. prolly she has the money to pay for her wedding decors and stuffs but our honeymoon will be an issue.. I only have 300 in the saving.. how am I gonna start planning when the budget is fucked up.. Im angry but if I vent my anger, she wont even have the heart to look for a job.. Im so confused what to do..

Honestly, I have no one to talk to.. even if I do, I dont think he or she can help.. everyone has their own problem.. every night I keep thinking what I can do to improve the situation.. sometimes I even wish I can gamble and win some cash for us to go honeymoon but it will not be halal..

Sometimes I even wish I will not wake up tmr so I dont have to face the world.. but Im not prepared to die either.. I donno.. I donno..

time : 2335hrs

date : 12 March 2013
time : 2321hrs

Assalamualaikum..

Im blogging now coz I dowanna share my thoughts in Twitter.. not a good platform.. ppl can see what Im feeling.. I will just post it here..

6 more months to our wedding but Im not that excited.. maybe not excited at all.. deep down Im scared.. Im scared it might not go the way I want it to be..

My fiancee has not been working since Jan 2013.. I need help with the finance.. prolly she has the money to pay for her wedding decors and stuffs but our honeymoon will be an issue.. I only have 300 in the saving.. how am I gonna start planning when the budget is fucked up.. Im angry but if I vent my anger, she wont even have the heart to look for a job.. Im so confused what to do..

Honestly, I have no one to talk to.. even if I do, I dont think he or she can help.. everyone has their own problem.. every night I keep thinking what I can do to improve the situation.. sometimes I even wish I can gamble and win some cash for us to go honeymoon but it will not be halal..

Sometimes I even wish I will not wake up tmr so I dont have to face the world.. but Im not prepared to die either.. I donno.. I donno..

time : 2335hrs