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Sunday, 20 February 2011
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2/20/2011 09:44:00 pm
date : 20th February 2011 time 2151hrs Assalamualaikum~ This week had been such a farqed up week.. Reason ; I met Rufi twice.. on Wednesday and just now.. The sight of her just makes me sic.. I can get along very well with other exs but when I saw her, my heart shattered into pieces and I'm fucking pissed off.. Me and Ryna were watching the angklong performance at the Esplanade when I turned and saw her with her husband and daughter.. there were a few others also, I think they're her in-laws ah.. Maybe she saw me standing nearby before I turned and saw her, thats why she quickly wanna walk away from there.. What's more hurting was when I saw them pushing the stroller that I bought for her when we were together.. My mobile phone's battery was dead so I cant text Ida about it.. fortunately, Ryna was there for me.. we talked and I teared up.. I was very scared.. and I'm still now.. scared I might get hurt again.. I know I can trust Ida but I'm still scared.. heart/feelings can change anytime.. the future is unpredictable.. you will never know what will happen, even in the next minute.. I still remember what kind of person I became after Rufi left me for the first time.. I took advantage of girls.. fling around with whoever and whenever I want.. Alhamdulillah I'm not that person anymore after she left me for the 2nd time.. Ida showed me that Allah never leaves behind His servants and family are always around to love you, Ryna lets me know that there's always someone for me whenever I'm down and Rafiean is a good friend who - maybe shows me that guys are always GEREK to hang out with.. Rufi just making it harder for me to trust women ah.. Aaargh~ Fuck you lah Rufi.. Sometimes I just wish that I dont even have an ex girlfriend.. the experiences that I had are just killin' me.. Wait~ maybe those experiences taught me to be a better person.. especially being a boyfriend in a relationship and so on~ I just received a text from Ida and it's very soothing.. it calms me down.. I'm feeling alot better and more confident to be in a relationship.. Well, her words are very motivational and encouraging.. Thank you.. besides her, Ryna also advised me not to think too much about what just happened in the evening.. unfortunately, I cant do that.. I will still keep thinking about it but I will look at it in a positive perspective.. Thank you too..  Anyway, tomorrow is my bestbud, Zaf, 26th Birthday! HAPPY 26TH BIRTHDAY! He shares the same birthdate as Sam but Sam tak penting ah.. haha! Hopefully you will have the greatest life ah eh! You have ur WR scrambler, now what you need is a girlfriend.. or I will give u a girl as your present.. C'mooon~  Before I end, I'd like to share the logo that I drew and designed.. It's a picture of a rat.. Well, in my cliques, we each have our own animal name/calling.. as for me, I'm a rat.. Kurt started it first.. reason, he said I have huge ears.. ok, lame reason.. I was inspired to design this after I saw Blink 182's documentary and Mark Hoppus shared about his Octopus logo.. So I came up with my rat logo.. Hahaha!  Kay, have an awesome week ahead.. See ya! Yours GEREK-ly, ariffmohamed time : 2334hrs |
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